Pay It Forward

A few years ago, I attended a wedding that the officiating minister referred to as having been "a long time coming". At first the congregation was a little taken aback by that comment because the adorable couple had had one of those "on again, off again" relationships over a span of seven years and I think that many of us were thinking "wow, dude... that's blunt". But then he went on to elaborate that these two people were standing there as a result of the love, devotion and committment of their parents, their grandparents, and all those that had come before them. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief...

Over the past few days, I've had been involved in several unrelated conversations that have given me reason to think about how lucky I am in the many blessing that I have in my life. I am reasonably healthy, well educated, financially secure, (or at least as secure as any regular person is in this day and during this economy), and graced with two amazing little boys of which I am probably most undeserving. I've worked hard to get to this stage in my life. I have. But there are also so many people, so many circumstances, so many examples of "luck of the draw", that have allowed me to reach this place in life that really have nothing to do with me or my own efforts. I did not get where I am on all by myself and I do not owe the what I have in life entirely to myself. I reap the benefits daily of the society I was born into and the blessings of the loving family who raised me. I am lucky beyond all measure.

One of the conversations that got me rolling on this thought process came through a discuss with a few other adoptive mother about our children and some emotions related to how they came to us. The specifics of the conversation are personal, private and fairly intense, but what I distilled from my own thought processes has to do with feelings of responsibility. The feeling of needing to embrace some kind of way to "pay it forward".

The Wikipedia commentary on "Pay it Forward" states: The expression "pay it forward" is used to describe the concept of asking that a good turn be repaid by having it done to others instead. In contract law, typically there are two parties but there is the concept of third party beneficiaries. Pay it forward merely applies this contract law concept so that third party beneficiary be a stranger to the creditor (or obligee). More specifically, the creditor (obligee) offers the debtor (obligor) the option of "paying" the debt forward by lending it to a third person instead of paying it back to the original creditor. Debt and payments can be monetary or by good deeds.

I need to "pay it forward". It's not just about my little boy, it's about my whole life. I'm taking baby steps. We'll see how far I get. But imagine what the world could accomplish if we were all trying to "pay it forward."